I have been told that for all that I share, for all the heart on my sleeve wearing that I do, that I am, at my depth, a private person. Yet, aren’t we all like that? How much of the struggle to we really allow people to see? How much of the yuckiness of what we are going through do we share without sounding like we exist in a perpetual victim state? And how much do we really want people to know?
I have days where everything just sucks. That the sunniest of sun patches cannot bring me out of this place of drab and dark, despite my wish that they would. But that darkness and muck and mire is all part of me. And it’s ugly, and awkward, and so damn uncomfortable, but it’s also beautiful and strange and makes me feel like the light does not need to be a constant theme in my life.The light eventually works it’s way back in, as light is want to do, and I welcome it back with open arms.
I still have a hard time opening my arms to my drab and dark side, because the light is so much warmer. But we know that without darkness that there is no light. That in the muddiest of waters, blooms the beautiful and noble lotus blossom. We seem to want to push away the dark, the awkward, and deny it a place in our lives. But by denying that part of us we deny who we are. As we grow in our mothers womb, we are in the dark. In birth we are forced into the light and into a world that does it’s best to balance the two.
At a time when there is so much darkness in the world, we need more of the light. When I see in the news that a 2 year old girl is murdered and I wonder how one person can commit such an act of violence, I also see a community rise and come together for the family. When I see that a child drowns crossing an ocean trying to escape war and destruction with his family and so many others, my heart hurts deeply. And then I see a world come together to provide shelter, clothing, jobs, food, teddy bears and open arms for the survivors.
There will always be what we percieve as ugliness in our world. There will always be trolls who will comment on a HONY Facebook feed and try to drag people down to their depths with their words. There will always be people who preach the message of hate.
However, if we take into consideration that darkness exists so that light can shine bright, it’s possible to see that darkness is in fact, a gift. How we greet the darkness is fully dependant on us.
We have passed the darkest day here in the northern hemisphere and we are heading back into the light seasonally. Hopefully, it’s also a symbolic sign of our world moving into the light.
Shining a light so bright even David Bowie could see it tonight,